Crew Win with Luchametric Formation; Thierry Henry Gets What's Coming to Him

Jack Ruby style, like a thief in the night, El Luchador tonight confronted the cheating Thierry Henry at Crew Stadium after the Red Bulls' humiliating defeat at the hands of the Black and Gold.

Robert Warzycha took the advice of the Luchametric Institute and played the 4-2-3-1 formation in the attacking phase with Renteria up top, and the Crew won handily 2-0 on goals from Renteria and Brian Carroll. Although they "lined up" in the 4-4-1-1 to start both halves, GBS played back deeper than in previous matches and Renteria was the lone marauding striker up front.  And the starts by Expo and Renteria, as we had suggested, clearly gave the crew the attacking prowess they had been lacking.

But the highlight of the evening was when El Luchador spoke truth to power, made Mark McCullers' Security Forces and Columbus Police nervous, and scouted out The Cheater's location to charge in and achieve justice for the people of the Republic of Ireland.  El Luchador did what any sensible football fan would do and called  Henry out on his despicable handball that cost the Irish a place in the World Cup this year.

After France's disgraceful but predictable collapse in South Africa, Henry announced his signing with New York, and he flew to Columbus to witness his team lose to the Crew from a luxury box on the northwest corner of the stadium.

Thierry Henry: As a Frenchman, you know how to surrender. Go ahead and do so  now. Based on what we saw from the Red Bulls tonight, even your cheating ways will not save you or your newly chosen comrades.

Hagalo Columbus! DO IT!

The Beautiful Game Triumphs Over Evil

There is a difference between the physical style of football played in England and emulated by many MLS teams and the type of brutal, uncivilized, ugly scrum we saw last night from San Jose.

It was clear that the aptly named Earthquakes invaded Columbus with the game plan of trying to steal at least a point by doing nothing more than fouling on every play and playing the long ball in hopes of winning the lottery.

It is precisely this type of ugly, American-style “soccer” that prevents the rest of the world from taking the MLS seriously.

The Crew still managed to pull out a win by sticking to their brand of football, the Columbus School: A mix of beautiful South-American passing game, just a touch of Midwestern physicality and the periodic long-ball to open up the ground game.

The fact that the Columbus School beat the Straight-Out-of-Compton style was a triumph of good versus evil.

It is a crime that this victory came at the cost of several Crew players being beaten like Rodney King and Brain Carroll having his arm pulled from the socket.

Who is to blame for this?

His name is Abiodun "Abbey" Okula, and he is quite possibly the worst referee in Major League Soccer.

He missed the obvious handball that led to Ryan Johnson’s goal and repeatedly allowed the Earthquakes to play their thuggish style of American soccer with almost no consequences.

This wasn't just a "physical game" as the Dispatch put it, implying that it was within the range of acceptability. This was beyond the pale. This was one team playing the Beautiful Game and the other competing in a professional wrestling smack down.

Until the MLS has refs of higher quality who are trained to not allow this type of spectacle, the league will never get the international esteem it needs for long-term sustainability.

One final thought: If only that beer thrown from the Nordecke had hit Johnson’s douche face.

Crew Will Bounce Back from RSL Debacle

Reminder: It’s “Columbus Till I Die.” It’s not, “Columbus till we get our asses handed to us.”

The 4-1 loss in Salt Lake City was indeed embarrassing. If you want the details read the Dispatch.

But, let’s not start into, “This is the worst performance ever,” “the team played with no heart,” blah, blah, blah.

There are a lot of factors that contributed to this loss. These are not excuses but facts: It was the first major road trip of the year besides the opener, at altitude (4,220 ft), without Hejduk, with a Moreno who had traveled 14,000 miles, with a Rogers just back from injury, in the cold rain, on a night when our rock Hesmer somehow managed to screw the pooch on back-to-back unassisted goals, the second one like something from the WPS.

But there were positives: Garey’s plucky goal, Marshall’s leadership in the back, Schelotto’s energy and verve (until the end, when all was lost), and Carroll’s playmaking.

I will tell you this, my brothers and sisters in Black & Gold: As sure as Lazarus rose from the tomb, on the soul of Che Guevara, with the blessings of divine providence, the Crew will come back from this, and it will happen sooner than you think.

This is the same team that won the Cup. They are in good hands with the Polish Rifle.

Be true to your school, bitches.

Next stop: Los Angeles. Crew 2, Chivas USA 0.

Columbus Till I DIE!

Crew Notch Two Shut-Out Wins in Final Florida Exhibition

The Crew will head home from Florida Thursday with a 3-2 preseason record after defeating the University of Tampa and the University of Central Florida in a double header of 60-minute exhibition matches at the IMG Academies in Bradenton on Wednesday.

Tampa went down 2-0 in the first game on goals by midfielders Emmanuel Ekpo and Brian Carroll. Kenny Schoeni recorded the clean sheet in goal.

The second match was a lopsided 6-0 affair with Central Florida looking like school boys matched up against the Black & Gold, even with Coach Robert Warzycha mixing up the line up considerably.

Trialists Ty Shipalane and Jordan Seabrook both scored. Hebrew Hammer Andy Gruenebaum got the shutout.

The Crew head to Liverpool, England on Wednesday, Feb. 25, to train at the facility of Warzycha’s old Club, Everton and play exhibition games against the Everton and Liverpoll development teams.

Robbie Rogers to Get First Cap

Tune in tonight as Robbie Rogers makes his national team debut before his hometown fans in the stadium he watched be built as a youngster and where his Crew won the MLS Cup just two months ago.

While the line-ups won’t be released until game time, El Luchador has learned that it is a done deal: Coach Bob Bradley will start the 21-year old Crew stand-out in the friendly against Sweden at the Home Depot Center in Carson, Calif. Rogers will earn his first cap in front of family and friends.

Rogers is listed as a midfielder and will play in an attacking role in a 4-4-2 formation, El Luchador predicts. The game starts at 8:30 p.m. EST and is available on Fox Soccer Channel.


Rogers played for his country at the 2007 FIFA U-20 World Cup in Canada. And of course was outstanding as a starter for the men's 2008 US Olympic Team in Beijing. But this will be his first appearance with the big boys.

Unless the Chicago Fire’s Jon Busch (MLS goalkeeper of the year) gets injured and other things break his way, Wil Hesmer will warm the bench tonight.

Eddie Gaven and Brian Carroll could see action as substitutes in the midfield because injuries and overseas obligations have left Bradley with a somewhat shallow squad, and he will need to give some of the youngsters a chance.

Many of the U.S. regular starters are competing overseas, including Landon Donovan, Tim Howard, Carlos Bocanegra and Oguchi Onyewu. So, Bradley is anxious to give playing time tonight to other players before the first World Cup qualifier Feb. 11 against Mexico in C-Bus.

Big Chad Marshall had to leave the training camp due to knee injury, but he is reported to be recovering well. He should be good to go as the Crew report for preseason this Sunday.

Watch the game at Claddagh Irish Pub (585 S. Front St.) where Frankie Hejduk will be on hand, according to brother Crewfighter.